RANSVESTIA

motivation to cross-dress. If sexual relief was not the sole attraction, then, what was?

When I reached this point, new understandings began to flow freely.

Completely dressed in feminine clothes to suit the situation, I went about normal tasks of maintaining my career. This included a good deal of creative writing, tending bills, making phone calls, arranging meetings and so forth. However, living in peace with the lady inside brought a new verve for the routines of life. My whole approach lost the ponderousness that marked it before. I found a new lightness. I was taking less time to do things for the simple reason that my attitude was more positive in the beginning. Surprising new energy filled me. Accomplishments were much more satisfying.

On the personal side, I was aware that my skirts and slips and bras and panties were no longer a novelty to me; I had become quite used to them. However, this in no way diminished my desire to wear them.

The various chores of tending my feminine self slowly became a part of my daily routine. For instance, body hair had to be kept at a minimum. Although, at first, it had been quite an exciting operation, it now seemed the normal thing to do.

Washing, ironing and minor mending soon lost their novelty and I found myself absorbing these little jobs as a necessary part of my schedule. In time, I found myself developing a truly feminine knack for neatness and a feel for doing the work properly, free of giddy flourishes.

But, perhaps most astonishing of all was the automatic change that took place in my physical movements. After a lifetime in masculine clothes, it is quite reasonable to expect that the wearing of skirts, high- heeled shoes and all the ofl or items of women's apparel would modify the manner in which one moves. However, I know that the phenomenon that occurred within me went beyond that. A totally unconscious feeling of grace seemed to effect everything that I did. Even in a wide skirt, my step were no longer full masculine strides; I was more aware of how I sat arms reached gracefully instead of grabbing; I climbed steps one at a tene. None of these alterations in behavior involved a conscious effort on my part. They simply appeared from somewhere within. Most im- portant, they occurred daily, whenever I dressed and with no regard whatsoever to my sexual attitude toward the clothes or my extraordinary

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